About Sarah Jasmin Cartsburg
Foto: Jens Wazel
Do you remember the biggest dream you had when you were a teenager?
The one thing that you would have given up everything for?
My biggest dream was a little bit unconventional - because my biggest dream was to become enlightened. I'm serious.
My parents were atheists and my entire surrounding was absolutely normal, so there was nothing spiritual in my life that could explain this deep desire inside my heart except that it must come from within me (and not from the outside).
Let me start from the beginning:
When I was 8 years old my dad was killed in a hot air balloon accident.
Not only had my dad being killed in an accident but it was also the kind of accident where you begin to wonder "why on earth did this happen to him? "
Why on earth was he in that one hot air balloon that fell off the sky in the last 100 years.
This really made me question everything - it made me question my entire life.
It made me question "If God really existed why would He do such a thing? Why would he steal my dad?"
Do you know that feeling I'm talking about?
This might have happened to you as well at some point in your life, but being a child it was even harder.
All my friends went on with their normal life, as if it was normal, and of course their life probably was - but mine wasn't anymore.
I really had lost this ability to just be happy.
The sudden death of my father had taken it away from me.
I didn't only feel unhappy, but I also started feeling like an outsider, as if no one could understand what I was going through (and they probably couldn't).
Because how do you want to understand such thing if it has never happened to you? It's impossible!!! As a child this made me feel very lonely.
This event has really changed the course of my life.
Because ever since then I've been on a quest to become happy again, I've been on a quest to become free from all these worries and fears and things that just shouldn't be in a child's life.
My mother also didn't know how to deal with it, so she decided to learn how to meditate.
So my brother and me decided to learn it as well.
During these meditation classes, they told me, that if I meditate two times a day for 20 minutes each time, on a regular base, I would become happy again. Sounds great, right?
I was highly motivated:-)
My mum still tells the story today that even one time - when I was really sick and in the hospital -
I still got up on my cushion into a sitting position in the hospital bed and I would start to meditate because I really, really desperately wanted to be happy again!
Well it turned out it wasn't that easy - and just the 20 minutes a day, 2 times a day didn't work out for me that well, but I KNEW you can become happy if you meditate.
Maybe it was just the wrong method for me.
The method we were learning was Transcendental Meditation, a very famous meditation technique.
So by the time I was a teenager I had not only become a vegetarian all by myself, by my own choice but I had also decided that I will use this life that is given to me to become enlightened.
The reason why I wanted to become enlightened so badly was that I believed by reaching nirvana I could be ultimately happy again.
I convinced my mum that I need to go on a year long student exchange to Thailand when I was 15 years old - because I figured that Thailand would be the perfect place to learn more about meditation.
A few months in that student exchange, I found myself on the hard cold stone floor at 3:30 am. getting ready to rise.
How on earth did I get here?!?
Well, they told me there is this meditation retreat that I could go on and of course I said yes - but no one told me about the details!
We had to:
- sleep on a stone floor
- sit quietly and meditate for just about 10 hours a day. (that´s not a long time right? :-)
We were not allowed to:
- to write
- nor to read
and we were not even allowed to have dinner! Can you imagine that?
At that age I was constantly hungry - so this was one of the hardest parts for me:-)
I mean, I was a teenager, not a saint!
The first two days were really terrible.
I was sitting there every morning being freezingly cold, the mosquitoes would bite me up (we were also not allowed to kill the mosquitoes because it was a Buddhist monastery) - so there were thousands of mosquitoes trying to attack me while I was supposed to sit quietly and stop thinking. My God, it was impossible. I was a teenager.
I was constantly chatting in my mind - there was no quietness.
I was so frustrated because it just didn't workout for me - no one had told me that the road to enlightenment was so difficult!
If you had offered me at that time that you could make my wish of becoming enlightened go away I would have gone for it - but that wish just didn't go away.
You probably know this, that some things are so deeply embedded inside of you that you never lose them. They are always there.
Sometimes they're more in the background and sometimes they're more present - but they just never vanish. You know that if you don't listen to it you will never find peace in this life.
That's how it felt like for me, but after a few days my patience and not giving up paid off itself. Because I had such an amazing spiritual breakthrough that you can't even imagine if you've never experienced it yourself.
I was walking towards the dining hall and suddenly everything started to shift. My perception become so strange and everything was happening like in slow motion. It was like as if I was one with everything. I was one with the trees surrounding me, I was one with the air I was breathing. I was one with my heartbeat, I was one with the universe and I was extremely happy. If it hadn't been a monastery, I would have been convinced that someone had taken drugs in my food, but since it was a monastery I figured that this must have come from the meditation. Having this experience I was hooked and in that moment I made a decision:
I made the decision to do whatever is needed to experience such an incredibly amazing state of consciousness as often as possible in my life.
I finished the other days of the 10 day meditation retreat and unfortunately I didn't have such an experience again.
During that retreat a lot of people have actually left - which I can understand, because it is really hard to watch your mind for 10 days straight and to suddenly be faced with the irrational things that are going inside of your mind that you have just never been aware of.
The strange thing that struck me afterwards was, that it never even appeared to me for a single second that I could give up.
Because the desire inside of me to give all I could into having more of these experiences. was (and still is!) so strong.
After my experience in that monastery I realized that meditating with this technique is way too frustrating for me.
Because if 10 days meditating straight all day long only gave me one single spiritual breakthrough experience, that wasn't enough to keep me motivated enough to keep meditating everyday.
I went on a quest to learn and to find the best meditation techniques that are out there.
I was sure that there must be something that is more easy and it is more applicable in daily life. I started travelling all around the world to learn from the best meditation teachers and spiritual teachers I could find.
I had the honor to learn from a few really, really amazing teachers, but it was only
when I tried re-incarnation therapy that I had the next breakthrough.
The teacher I was working with at that time had the attitude that the spiritual knowledge, the spiritual abilities, clairvoyancy and all those other spiritual things have already happened to us in previous lives - so the experiences are actually already there.
Your mind already knows how to have these experiences on a more frequent basis but you are blocking yourself from these experiences because of a traumatic experience that you've had in a previous life.
That sounds really weird when you hear it for the first time, I know, but what she did was taking me back into a past life of mine where I had led a very, very spiritual life. And by working with me with some therapeutic techniques she helped me rediscover my spiritual gifts that have been inside of me all the time.
They were just never available to me because of this blockage that I had put on my abilities.
No matter whether you believe that previous lives exist or not it doesn´t matter - because after that single session my spiritual gifts were free!!!
They were available to me now that I knew how to access them - and it made this entire spiritual journey and quest I was on so much easier.
I wished this had happened to me like 5 years earlier so I could have saved all these endless hours of learning meditation:-)
From now on I could profit from just clearing the things away that stopped me from activating my full potential.
And of course I learned all those amazing techniques from that teacher, so I could help other people uncover their spiritual gifts as well.
It also works for other gifts you may have, by the way, and is probably the most profound life-hack I´ve ever come across.
Let's fast forward a few years in time:
I have been studying alternative medicine in India because I really had this deep urge inside of me to help people uncover their true spiritual gifts and to relieve people from their problems, that were blocking them - and I believe the more knowledge and experience I´ve gained, the better I can help!
I want to be honest with you: I don't think I've learnt very much while studying alternative medicine.
You might know this to be true in your own life you - don't learn the important things from books or teachers. The most important things in your life you learn through your own experience. Through trial and error, through magical coincidences that just somehow happen.
(Of course though, a great teacher is somehow needed to get you there - but you still have to make your OWN Experiences!)
After having studied alternative medicine in India I went on a trip to travel the world to find the perfect place to live.
I knew that I wasn't happy with the idea of living in Germany, but also didn't know where else it would be so much better.
I sold everything I owned and bought a one way ticket to Nepal and decided to go with the flow, to listen to my intuition and to not return until I have found a place that I can feel at home at.
But life (or the universe, god, my soul - whoever was responsible) had other plans for me:
A few months after I started traveling I got really sick.
I had met up with a good friend of mine in Thailand and I had already been feeling for the last weeks that I wasn't physically well.
But after my friend had arrived something very, very strange happened.
I was lying in a hammock having a major headache while she was talking to me and suddenly I could still hear what she was saying and I was trying to answer but I was being sucked out of my body and loosing all the control of my body.
So I couldn't answer her anymore - I couldn't even move.
I just realized that she was freaking out because I wasn't moving anymore, I wasn't speaking anymore and she didn't know what to do.
I saw all of this from way above outside my body but I couldn't do anything about it.
I was screaming as loud as I could but nothing would come out of my mouth.
It was so freaky. I was really afraid
because something like that had never happened to me before and it was freaking me out.
I think it was freaking my friend out too and then I was gone.
My friend started running around the resort shouting, "Is there a doctor here can anyone help me my friend? She looks like she's unconscious I don't know what to do."
You wont believe what happened next! This is such a magical coincidence that I cant even really believe it myself.
The guy living in the cottage next to do happened to be a doctor - and he didn't only happen to be a doctor, but he also happened to have had a patient not so long ago who had died from typhoid.
So he was looking at me and he immediately realized just by looking at me that I must have typhoid and that if I'm not being flown to a hospital right away I'm going to die.
He somehow managed to get an airplane to pick me up and fly me to Chiangmai.
All of this happened while I was in a dream like state in this other world where I was meeting my spirit guides and I was discussing with them why I should go back or I'd rather stay why I don't want to go back.
I really didn't like my life so much at that point.
I was never truly happy except when I was meditating and having spiritual experiences.
I was constantly having pain, headaches or something similar.
I had just been left by the man who I thought would be the man I´ll spend the rest of my life with.
I couldn't really figure out the meaning of my life and it all seemed pointless to me and meaningless.
Being in this other world and talking to my spirits, this was where I wanted to be.
I felt so much happier being up there.
Being in this other world - where my emotional body and my physical body didn't matter anymore - just felt so much more easy and light and so much more natural to me.
But at some point the spirit guides convinced me that of course it is my free choice - but that I have come to planet earth, that I have been born into this human body in this life for a reason.
It's an important reason because I have to help other people to wake up to raise their consciousness - to experience the same experiences that I could have on a daily basis now - because I knew all the techniques, how to have them.
So I decided (after a really long discussion with them!!!) to give it another chance and to come back.
But this time stop strolling around and looking for the meaning of life and start doing what I am here for!
Then I woke up again.
I found myself in this very strange hospital room and I had no idea how I got there - but I was alive again and from that day on I knew why I am here for and it is knowledge changed everything.
Because now I don't feel anymore that it's a burden to have a human body.
Having a body is not always easy:
You have to eat healthy.
You have to exercise.
You have to sleep - and everything is so slow here on earth compared to the spiritual world (it still drives me crazy sometimes!).
But having a body also allows me to interact with other human beings - with you!
Not everybody is able to talk directly to spirit guides and to angels or to beings who live in other dimensions and other planes of existence - but I'm able to live in both worlds.
So I can take the information, the knowledge and everything I get from the spirits and transfer it (through my podcast, my meditations, my teachings and working with my clients 1:1)
to give it to you - so that you can benefit.
So that you learn how to find your own path through life
how to rediscover your true inner power
how to find the meaning of your life and
how to remember why you have come here
and what you are supposed to do with your life.
Even though my journey of getting where I am today was really hard sometimes - it made me an outsider for many years of my life and it nearly killed me - I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Because by following my heart's deepest desire
I've learnt to find all the answers I'm looking for.
I've learnt to trust my heart and my intuition over what others tell me to do.
I've learnt that life is full of miracles - small ones and big ones - If you allow your eyes to open to see them.
I've learnt that when you are all alone and everything seems to fall apart there will always be another human being reaching out to help you - no matter where you are in the world.
I've learnt that going after my dreams is the only way I want to live my life.
Because through my deepest desires my soul speaks to me
- and I know that through your deepest desires your soul speaks to you.
I've learnt that if you follow your heart unconditionally - even if it seems irrational sometimes -
you can create anything you really wish to have or experience in your life.
I have created this podcast to help you connect more easy to your soul, to your spirit and to the deeper meaning of your life.
I have created it so that you never have to feel as lonely as I used to feel when I started on my spiritual journey. Because I felt that no one out there understands me.
I´m here for you. Please reach out to me anytime!
To start your spiritual journey I want to invite you to try some of the free meditations that I have created for you.
They will help you in an incredibly easy way as a shortcut to having spiritual experiences.
Because I know that you might not have 15 years time to spend meditating in ashrams and traveling through India - so please download your free meditation and start your journey now.
I'm deeply honored that you have given me some time to connect with you and to read my story.
I hope you have a truly magical and wonderful day.
8 Things you didn´t know about me.....
I love green tea and dark chocolate.
My neighbours probably think I´m crazy - because i often dance with headphones & barefoot in our garden.
Trees are my best friends - I often sit under an old oak when i am meditating about important decisions or if i am creating new podcast episodes for you.
I love to be in water to clear my emotions & thoughts - if i can´t swim because it´s too cold, i take a warm bath daily.
My favourite part of the world - except where i live - is Kauai.
I do have bad days sometimes - just like every other human on this planet (Yes, you might have thought this never happens to highly spiritual people - but we have them too:-).
I was raised by 100% atheistic parents - so i must have brought the spiritual longing with me from before I was born.
I´m absolutely passionate about books - both fiction and non-fiction!
If i find a good one, i usually finish it in 1 day. (And that includes books with 700 pages.)
Some of my favourite fiction authors are Lucinda Riley, Sarah Lark, Cecelia Ahern and Sophia Kinsella.
My 3 most popular ThetaMeditations will create more happiness, inner peace & real purpose in your life - instantly. PROMISE!
(without loosing a lot of time and even if you are a total beginner:-)
"This awesome meditation has changed my view upon life!"
Stefan Günther - Engineer, Canada
Martin - Master of Bioinformatics, Berlin
I never send you and Spam. Promise!
These people have had a great influence on me - I am deeply grateful to them!
Bruce Lipton und das Heart Math institute
Scarlett Dee Mehigan
Lama und Asu Chewang
...and many more!